To my sweet inspiration:

1_crying_girlI miss you. I’ve been feeling empty inside without you around. Maybe lost is a better way to describe it. I’ve been looking all over for you, but haven’t been able to find you. I don’t know where you’ve gone and I’m like a lost child at the mall desperately seeking her mom. My eyes are welling as they dart from side to side each time I think I’ve caught a glimpse of you. My hands are trembling in fear you might leave without me. My stomach is churning in nervousness you might never come back.

What happened? I thought we were doing so well. Remember that time you brought me the “lone nut” video? Remember that? We were so happy together that day. You sat beside me as I wrote, encouraging me with every word like my own personal cheerleader. I felt like I was soaring. We giggled. We hugged. We were like inseparable teenage BFFs. I thought we’d be together forever.

But recently something has changed. I haven’t heard from you in such a long time despite my efforts to call you. Are you screening my calls? Did you change your number? Are you ignoring me? Are you mad at me? Please don’t say you’ve found another author to share your genius with. Please don’t. It would kill me. I need you, but every time I look around all I see are other artists with their inspiration walking together arm in arm, cavorting and living with such ease in the moment. They only remind me of my loneliness without you. Each word I type feels hollow. Each idea trivial. I sit, near lifeless, in front of my screen longing for my sweet inspiration to return to me.

Maybe I was too distracted when you came to me with your latest vision. Maybe I’ve let “life” get in the way of a true connection with you. Maybe I didn’t say “I love you” enough. Maybe another artist is treating you better than I ever did and you’re finding fulfillment in someone else’s heart. I don’t know. I wish I knew.

Please tell me its not too late for us. I can change. I’m ready to change. Please know it’s my simple desire to be with you always. Let me show you I’m worthy. We can change the world together. I know we can. When I’m with you my world is magical. You always leave me spellbound and blissful. I want to give that to you too. Please give me another chance. I beg you. I am nothing without my inspiration.

In hopes you will come back soon.

Yours always,
Andrea

P.S. I made homemade chocolate chip cookies for you.

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